Tuesday, March 30, 2010


So, about once a month, I get an email, or someone posts a comment that says "I think I may have spotted Janna on such-and-such message board," or "I know someone who knows someone who may have gotten scammed by Janna," or, worst of all "I fear I may have been scammed by Janna." I ask them to give me whatever details they've got, and sometimes it's pretty clear it WAS Janna, but she's had time to cover her tracks, so there's little tangible going on.

This time, her scam got nipped in the bud PDQ, before she could do any serious emotional damage to her new targets. Yay! And...she was fast, but not fast enough to wipe away all the proof. Double yay.

Here we go. Keep your arms and legs inside the car at all times.

She pretended to be someone called "Janet Wilder," who was legally blind, who had a son who died two years ago at age 23. She insinuated herself on a message board for Johnny Weir, the figure skater, and, well, let's let her tell her own story.

"But Ephemerina," I hear you say, "how can you be sure this is Janna? Lots of people lose loved ones to cancer."

Well, dear readers, read on.

That's right, all the little "tells" - her fake masters' in psychology, Elvis fucking Presley yet again, and yet another tedious 70s band that really nobody gives a rat's ass about in this new millennium.

Still, I hear you say "it could just be a coinkydink, maybe you're just so paranoid you see Janna everywhere."

Well, doubting Thomases and Thomasinas, take a gander at this:

Nothing interesting to read, but holy cats! look at the avatar. It's those goddamned trinkets she makes.

"But Ephemerina!" you whine. "I really think it's just a whole load of coincidences. Just because reading this crap gave you a hinky feeling, lots of people make those shitty trinkets, and really, it could just have been that this ghostwriter person BOUGHT these trinkets, maybe even from Janna herself, after all this person is in Chicago too."

Christ, you folks are a pain in the ass sometimes.

Further poking around led me to a Twitter account, which confirmed a hunnert percent that this freakazoid was indeed nobody other than Janna Hopper Saint James St James Priggie. She had a Twitter account called WilderThinger, and she deleted it virtually moments after I read it. Way to go, lady. If nothing else woulda confirmed it, that sure as shit did.


Because I nabbed her so soon after her outing, there was lotsa stuff still in Google's cache. Ha fucking ha ha.

That lady in the pic, the one who clearly doesn't know how to act her age? That tye-dyed twat, well, that is absolutely Janna. The looking up at the camera to disguise her chins, you just know she loves this photo.

But, the best thing was, her Twitter account came up with so many other leads. Like her Twitter name before it was WilderThinger.

Jesus tapdancing Christ, on and on with the goddamned crab thing.

It's all gone now, because one thing Janna knows how to do is cover her considerable ass. And I'm sure she's got another scam or two on the trot, with yet more Twitter accounts, so she won't be lonely. After all, pretending to be different people, well that's just like trying on a new pair of shoes, isn't it, Janna? Of course, in Janna's case, the shoes are often steel-toed jackboots, leaving people crushed in her wake.

But not this time. Not this time, Janet, you cunt. This time you got nailed just as you were casting your net. Because you've fucked with too many people over three decades who are not afraid to talk about how you fucked with them, and they've got an awful lot of friends. And there are an obscene amount of people who are Harlan Ellison and Josh Olson fans (and Styx fans too, judging from my data, go figure). All of that adds up to quite the anti-Munchausen-by-internet army, people determined to stop your nonsense by exposing you sooner rather than later.

This is the kind of result I was hoping for. I'm ecstatic that this blog has managed to save at least a small group of people from further heartache by this succubus. Today's a good day.

And Janna? Fuck you very much, from all of us.


Anonymous said...

You are so right...that's her, absolutely no doubt. What a head case she is. She deserves to be nailed to the wall for what she's done to Fogelberg and many of his fans. And that was only one little part of her sick life.

Anonymous said...

i read about what she did to his fans, but what did she do to dan fogelberg?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous #2, she pretended she was a therapist, and counseled him and his then-wife. But she betrayed confidences because duh she wasn't a licensed doctor of any sort and didn't have doctor-patient confidentiality restrictions. She basically busted up the marriage, many believe in the hopes that Fogelberg would turn to her in his time of need. She doesn't even really deny this, just of course makes assertions that the relationship would have broken up anyway. She misses the point entirely.

Anonymous said...

Plus, she impersonated Dan on message boards, instilling her rendition of him with all sorts of behavioral/emotional problems, to a legion of his fans. There are still some fans who believe that this was the way Dan was. A form of libel, at the very least.

Anonymous said...

O My Fookin god. You have GOT to be kidding me.
It's scary to know there are people out there like this...who will go to such elaborate extremes to sucker-punch people. What a sad fucking existence that cunt has...to do nothing but try to scam another and another and another.
I'm so proud of you, ephemerina...for staying at this and warning as many people as possible.

Anonymous said...

In her ghostwriter piece she says: 'This morning I have come to see clearly...'

This is pure Janna, psychopathic syntax and all.

Has anyone warned Johnny Weir? Let's not have her do any damage to his reputation or to his fans.

(The screen captcha for this comment is 'hades'. Uh huh. Straight from.)

Anonymous said...

I knew a woman who claimed to be the abused ex-wife of Don Henley and she had an affair and a child with Glenn Fry. I wonder...

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't be at all surprised. Wanna give me some more input? Thanks!

Anonymous said...

Hi Audrey...to be quick, I read this whole sordid story in 07 when it came out in the LA Weekly, and was fascinated and repulsed...I took special interest because I once had an internet romance myself, in '97 before most people did such things, and a lot of my friends were worried that this person could be "anybody". Fortunately my person really was who he said he was, but I digress...for me it resonated as a "there but for the grace of god" situation. Anyway, I forgot about the whole thing until I recently read a book about literary hoaxes, and I recalled your story and looked your blog up again (I'd read this blog back in '07 after the story came out). Speaking of Janna's "tells" I just had to point this out...I became a fan of Josh Olson's writing after the story, and I remembered seeing his "No, I Won't Read Your Fucking Screenplay" essay in the Village Voice. It was hilarious...but when I saw this post of yours, about Janna on the skating board, her remark about shelling out $300 to see the Eagles only if they shelled out $300 to watch her type...seems TOTALLY bitten from this passage of Josh's from his essay:

"If that seems unfair, I'll make you a deal. In return for you not asking me to read your fucking script, I will not ask you to wash my fucking car, or take my fucking picture, or represent me in fucking court, or take out my fucking gall bladder, or whatever the fuck it is that you do for a living."

Maybe I'm just reaching, but it would seem that she is still stalking and copying Josh, and you, and god knows who else. What a horrid person...and I'm so, so sorry that you went through and still are going through such a nightmare!

Anonymous said...

Just thinking that someone should warn Justin Bieber that Janna is busy wanking around on fan forum's...he's her type...but wait, he's not queer...never mind.

Anonymous said...

Ha ha! My experience with Janna is so far in the past, it is but a distant bad memory. I look forward to the day when it is the same for you, dear Ephemerina. In the meantime, keep up the good fight and I will fight with you!

Anonymous said...

I thought that was a burned out old male hippie in that twitter avatar. lol

Anonymous said...

It is. In a way. Sigh.